Every week Christa and I try to take a day off. Yesterday was my day off and I found myself frustrated, discouraged and not wanting to go back to my normal life -- wanting to escape to some place where I didn't have all the responsibilities I have. I remember feeling like that on school days. I don't usually feel that way now -- I really like my life and am thankful for most of what I spend my time doing.
I've been trying to figure out why I often feel that way when I slow down and quit doing things. I don't have many answers, just a few clues and helpful activities:
Clues:
I still dream of singing with a killer band on a big stage. The times I've done this or something like it have been some of the most amazing times in my life.
Being alone is hard for me for some reason and some of it needs to change.
I get fits of insecurity where I wonder if I have anything of value to offer as a songwriter. (Resistance is real and ongoing).
Helpful activities:
Punching the punching bag hard for a while
Listening to Satellite (POD), Bringing it all Back Home (Dylan), something by Beck and "Salvation" by the Cranberries at high volume.
Feel free to substitute other exhausting activities and your own music selection...
Jonathan
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